I’m Shining ☀️😎

Today I Shine

They say you shine to brightly,

You should tone it down…..

I say…put on sunglasses,
Or better yet, turn around….

This light of mine was hidden away,
For oh so very long….

I broke down the barriers 
I set it myself Free….

  

Tone down you say? 
I say Hell No..

Today,  And Everday..

I’m Shining Strong…..😎

©lindafedroff-february26,2016

This is in response to a person who shall not be named and his comments……….this gal ain’t gonna stop shining!!!!!! 👊

Alone vs. Loneliness

[source-TaylorMarieMcMormick]

This morning, I pulled one of my old journals off the shelf. I do this yearly, around my birthday, to revisit myself, and to remind myself of where I was, and how far I’ve come, or not come. The paragraph below, was printed and taped into a journal entry…..

Loneliness, terrible aching loneliness, is all she has ever known. She was locked away when she was very young. Her owners were afraid of giving her freedom. She might fly away and never come back. She might not love them. They showed her love in the only ways they knew how. They gave her shelter and fed her well. They talk to her and treat her like the pet she’s become. They don’t realize they’ve killed her spirit, robbed her of her true nature. “Let Me Free,” she cries in song. She doesn’t know what “free” means, but she has a faint glimmer, a dream, a longing. Her wings know the feeling of flight even though she’s never soared. Her feathers dream of rustling through the breezes she’s never known. “Set Me Free,” she cries. Her soul is anguished; still she feels no feeling. She is numb. ~unknown Source~

[My Spirit knows what freedom is, but in this life, as this Linda-person, I’ve not experienced freedom in the way I know I can. I’ve been locked away, a great Spirit living a shadow life of the existence she is meant to know……I mourn the loss of my freedom.]

As a loner by nature, I do know, there is a distinct difference, from being alone and extreme loneliness. I know what it feels like to live in a house full of people, yet feel immense loneliness. For me…alone = good….loneliness=sucks.

 








Into The Calm 

  

As I wander the gloomy expanse of beach

I sit down beside the sea…


Over the pounding of the waves

I hear the whispers of quiet truths…


I dive into the calmness,

And leave the chaos and confusion

Of the world behind me…


In the ebb and flow of the sea,

I’m searching for my greater self.

She’s been hiding,

But I sense her presence…


I give in to the winds of change.

Letting go of the darkness,

I make room for the sanctity

Of light,

That is my Soul….

©lindafedroff-february24,2016

  

All By Myself…

This weeks Sandbox Writing Challenge is as follows:


The first word words to pop in my mind when confronted with the above image was

Povery: the state or condition of having little or no money, goods, or means of support;condition of being poor.

Forlorn: 1.desolate or dreary; unhappy or miserable, as in feeling, condition, or appearance. 

2.lonely and sad; forsaken

But, after studying it for a while longer….though she appears to be alone I see…Determination (Resolute)characterized by firmness and determination, as the temper, spirit, actions,etc.:

So, now that we’ve had our vocabulary lesson for the day 😉 on to the rest of the challenge.

I have a memory of myself, a skinny little girl, scared each time her mother would leave the house and leave me home alone with ‘him’. Every Sunday morning, she would leave the house  to go to the bakery while we were suppose to be sleeping. The minute I’d hear her leave, I’d awaken my sisters and sneak them out into the hallway of the 2 family house we lived in. We’d tiptoe up the stairs to the landing above and watch out the window for her to come home. As soon as we’d see her pull up to the curb, back down the stairs we would go…and then as quietly as we could, back to our room. 

In the Determined mind of that seven/eight year old girl, I was ‘saving’ us from him. I don’t remember ever thinking about what would happen if we were caught…I just knew I needed to get us out of the house. We never were caught, though I couldn’t save myself all the time. ( I can’t speak of or for my sisters. To this day, they side with our mother and feel I’ve been unfair to her and her hard life.)

 

(Funny, all the years I’ve had this photograph, it just struck me to see how I’m off to the side, while D & B are together….that’s pretty much the way it was is/was)