Can I Play With Your Mind? ðŸ¤•

Okie Dokie….another interesting question has been given to us via The Sandbox Writing Challenge……

What game is she playing with you? What games do you play with others?

I’m not exactly sure why the first part of the question is here?!?! I’m looking at the picture smiling thinking about playing peek-a-boo with Mason and Jemma 😊

Photo Source

Now the second part of the question……I’m guilty of playing games……Mind games..those games people play….Id like to think I don’t anymore…but there was a time and it shames me to think back on those times……

Though I could list a thousand reasons why…..the #1 reason being, he hurt me with the mind games he was playing…….so I’m going to hurt him and mess with his head too. What a hamster wheel I put myself on….they did nothing but make a bad situation worse….and those mind games rippled out and hurt others….. We were both pawns ….and in the end, there were no winners….there never is……

Though it took time, a lot of time, and growing up on my part……but the day came that I could humbly concede, and take full responsibility for my part in the destructiveness mind games played in my past…..
It would take many more years before I would begin to undo the damage his mind games played on me…….his words struck deep and I believed his put-downs. I believed I was ugly, unloveable. I believed there was no Me anymore. ……

My journey has taught and showed me differently…..I now know better. I’ve also come to kinda understand why he was  is, the way he was is. We made beautiful children together, but his needy insecurities and need to control grew as I began to ‘grow up’. So he would lay down the law and I’d rebel….until I’d stop rebelling, tired of the game…again, no winner. This continuum of a mind game was played out over 20 years……….no winners…….

After 22 years….the games stopped…….

Today, I am a victor in my journey and the celebration I feel is an earned one. I forgive myself my part in the ugly games we played with each other back then, and I forgive him too. ……………..some games are no fun to play. 


13 thoughts on “Can I Play With Your Mind? ðŸ¤•

  1. Isn’t it funny how we can go on playing games for years and not even realize it? And even after we realize it, it’s sometimes so hard to change that behavior. I think I’m finally making some progress on mine… You got a head start! GREAT post!

  2. Pingback: Sandbox Writing Challenge #50 — No fair peeking! | Impromptu Promptlings

  3. The game stops when there’s no pay off for one or both parties. Sounds like yours took a long time to extinguish. Ever read ‘Games People Play’ or ‘I’m OK You’re OK’ ?

  4. Sadly, I can relate to your musings. Good for both of us that we have moved on. Whenever my mind starts playing games today, I make every effort to replace those thoughts with something I enjoy, be it mental or physical. thank you for the reminders of our growth.

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