Time Marches On….

July 31, 2017 / spiritualdragonfly / 13 Comments

Today is day 290 since Jim died. I know the day will come when I stop counting….or at least I hope so 😔
In the meantime..I count…I grieve. I laugh. I cry. I write………and I finally blew the dust off my Nikon. It's time.
Took myself over to Joyner and walked a bit….took a few pics, then sat under a tree and wrote…..

Last day of July
That’s another full month without you.
As I sit here
Life is happening all around me.
Though I'm crying inside,
The beauty and gifts of this day
Are not lost to me….
I'm grateful for the breeze that’s
Whispering through the trees…
To the dragonfly and butterfly
Who's dance I was gifted to be
Witness to….
Bird song being sung
By an eclectic choir
While the cicadas add their
Own pitch to the magical
Music of Nature…..

While I sit here
Thinking of you….
Still crying my silent tears..
I close my eyes…..
I 'feel' your caress
AND
'hear' your whispers
As the breeze softly blows
Through the branches of the
Trees……

Another month without you….
Somehow I've made it through……

Tears…Nature=Healing

July 28, 2017 / spiritualdragonfly / 12 Comments

Week 41…Day 287 Since Jim gained his wings. I'm still counting my days by how long he's been gone. I'm amazed at how fast the time has flown by. I hear from other widowers who say the days drag by for them, almost at a stand-still. They're immobilized by their pain and grief. One thing I've learned through this journey , is there is no 'right' way to grieve. We all may be traveling a similar road, but our journeys are our own………

I was asked by a fellow blogger, if I've had days where I've wanted to just curl up and not move. I can honestly say no, that has not happened to me……….I believe a part of it is because Jim and I were such Morning people…loving our sunrises. I can't NOT get up and greet the new day. As much as I hurt and ache for him, I can't lose sight of the gift that the new day is…..and his love, well, that's a gift that keeps on giving, even from where he is. I can feel it ❤

This was my view yesterday morning from my bed…..how can I not want to get up and greet the new day?!?! I make my coffee, I sit outside, and we 'chat'.

Does he hear me…..of course he does……how do I know????? That's easy. ❤

This place I'm now calling home, is definitely helping me along….surrounded by 'my trees' , they're getting to know me and I them….I know they hear my cries. There is no judgement, I can just let the tears flow, knowing they listen…….and each time my tears fall, it's a cleansing of my soul…and with each cleansing, I heal a little bit more.

And what does one do once they've purged themselves of some pain? Collect some of the many pinecones of course….

And then some rocks….

Rebirth

July 24, 2017July 24, 2017 / spiritualdragonfly / 16 Comments

These words came about because of this photo I took this morning while cutting the grass. With as many walks as I’ve taken around my little piece of property, this was the first I noticed this growing out of a dead, broken stump. The first thing that came to mind was: From death, new growth starts….which led me to think of Rebirth…….and then this popped in my head….

“Then one day, she realized, she was healing. Her heart was slowly mending. Her soul started to shine.”