Good Morning All……it’s been a while since I’ve posted anything. Life has a way of getting in the way lately. I’m slowly turning this house into a home. I’m actually catching myself, while I’m out and about, thinking I can’t wait to get ‘home’ which I take as a good sign. 🏡
Slowly getting the place furnished as I help my daughter with her ‘stuff’. Last week she had surgery to remover her gallbladder so I was in nana and mommy duty…all this while they are trying to buy their own home 😬 Craziness…..though it’s keeping me busy.
But, I’m finding myself restless to start picking up my pencil. Pick up my pen. Pick up a paintbrush. I’m restless to write…restless to paint…….so this is my morning musing….
Wishing y’all a beautiful day…
As the sky begins to lighten
Bird song erupts
Breaking the silence
As it announces
Awakening my senses
As this new day unfurls….
When the grief and the pain start to overwhelm me, my Soul Strolls these days, take me to the trees………where in the past, I was comforted by the song of the sea, I now find refuge sitting amongst the ‘old ones’.
Sitting beneath this beautiful Oak Tree, I found some quietude…I found some much needed peace….and a little bit of my voice.
Here I sit.
Under this big Oak Tree.
I feel her strength ,
I ‘hear’ her wisdom
Whispered in the wind.
She’s telling me
“You Are Strong”
Her leaves, they dance.
And I dance too.
With each sway,
I feel lighter.
With each turn
I have found my new home.
Amongst the trees…..
Friday. My nemesis. Friday. The day he left. Today is 29 weeks, 203 days since Jim gained his wings. I’ve been working very hard at learning to celebrate my Friday’s and not dread them. I’d say I’m 70-30 there.
This morning I came across this ‘quote’….”SILENCE IS PURE. IT DRAWS PEOPLE TOGETHER BECAUSE ONLY THOSE WHO ARE COMFORTABLE WITH EACH OTHER, CAN SIT WITHOUT SPEAKING.”
This made me smile as I remember out first ‘date’. We were two married people who knew each other from working in the same store, acquaintances, nothing more. I left the store and didn’t see Jim for almost 5 months. When we unexpectedly bumped into each other, turns out both our lives had changed. We were both separated. He said let’s go out for a burger and a beer sometime. That wouldn’t happen for another 2 months. When it did, we bought sandwiches and Rolling Rock Beer and went and sat on his friends boat. The conversation flowed easily, as we talked about out lives, our families. It was a beautiful late May Day. The sun was sparkling off the lake. We found ourselves just sitting, quietly, staring at the water as the boat gently rocked. I remember thinking in my head…This is so nice. The silence is comfortable. At some point, I had leaned into him and we just continued to sit in that beautiful quietude.
2 people came together that day as friends looking for nothing more then conversation…we left that boat connected by something neither of us had ever experienced before.
We would come to enjoy many many more of those silent comfortable moments………………..I have no doubt y’all know what I’m talking about. Today, I hope you’ll join me in finding and stealing some special quiet time to sit with the memory of your beloved.
I Love You Husband ❤
The picture of us below was taken by a friend last Memorial Day. I remember it well. No conversation…just the water and dragonflies and Jims hand on my arm ❤
“Faith requires following the power of a whisper.” ~Shannon L. Alder~
Good afternoon my friends/family. The above quote is my quote for the day……today was, for me, the start of my new book..chapter one. It was inspection day for the house and property I’m purchasing.
My White Oak Tree
The pull I felt from the moment I stepped foot on the property was so strong…I heard and hear the whispers. My daughter and I were greeted by my muse, the dragonfly….I then visited with my tree.
Inspections went well. Barring anything major I close two weeks from today……199 days ago, my life drastically changed. Physically, Jim is not here…but I hear him in the whispers of the trees…I see him in my visiting dragonfly….I feel him all around and inside of me…..I know he’s with me as I start this new book of mine…………
May you all hear the whispers of your beloved ❤
I have a peach tree 😊🍑
My journey into Widowhood, has found me now, one of many contributing administrators to a FB widows healing group. My role is providing my take on my journey as I navigate, in as positive a way as I can, my life after Jim. I thought I’d share some of my posts here, one never knows who I can reach…….
Good Afternoon Folks! Busy start to the day as we had a ‘date’ at the local bookstore with Peppa Pig. If you have children/ grandchildren I’m sure you know who I’m talking about! As for me…I was ‘designated’ driver for Maddox 😊
Just call me Maddox’s Taxi
My Kristen and Jemma and the very famous Peppa Pig 😊🐷🐷
So as I was contemplating what I wanted to write today, I was watching my daughter and the other young parents with their children, and I was reminded of something I always used to say in regards to my own children….that I wanted them to grow their own wings and learn to fly……………………….I feel as though, at this time in my life, as I’m learning to adjust to my role as Jims widow, that while I thought I had grown my wings, those wings were grown with the help of others….I’ve come to realize My wings still have a lot more growing to do….for the first time in my life my growth is happening solo. As frightening as that was and is, I’m learning how to depend upon myself, because I have no other choice. The Linda I am today, is still a work in progress. I have Faith and I Believe my wings are gonna be Awesome!
Last night was a big party on White Street here! I choose to celebrate Jim on Friday…these wings of mine are slowly growing
“Pain is a pesky part of being human, I’ve learned it feels like a stab wound to the heart, something I wish we could all do without, in our lives here. Pain is a sudden hurt that can’t be escaped. But then I have also learned that because of pain, I can feel the beauty, tenderness, and freedom of healing. Pain feels like a fast stab wound to the heart. But then healing feels like the wind against your face when you are spreading your wings and flying through the air! We may not have wings growing out of our backs, but healing is the closest thing that will give us that wind against our faces.” W~C. JoyBell C.~