Have A Little Faith 🙏

Prayer vs. Coincidence

Prayer:

noun

1. a devout petition to God or an object ofworship.

2. a spiritual communion with God or an object of worship, as in supplication, thanksgiving,adoration, or confession.

Coincidence:

noun

1. a striking occurrence of two or more events at one time apparently by mere chance:

Since Jim died, I’ve drawn strength and comfort from our beliefs and my faith, and I believe, because of both, I’ve been able to navigate this journey of widowhood I’ve found myself on, but, I’ve found myself having a hard time praying. I didn’t know how to pray…..I mean, I talk to Jim and my grandfather all the time…..but I hadn’t talked to God, really talked to him in a long long time, so when it came to praying, I didn’t really know how. Was there a right or wrong way to pray?!? I wasn’t sure. I felt awkward with myself and even with my verbiage, or lack there of. I had this ‘vision’ that I was getting it all wrong. So, I bought a book .. a Celtic prayer book…a weeks worth of morning and evening prayers. I started reading from it daily, and still do. It’s helped..it gave me the jumpstart I needed. As time has gone on, I’ve realized there isn’t any real right or wrong way to pray, and I’m finally overcoming my uncomfortable awkwardness with myself…..and have found my own way to pray. Part of that awkwardness comes from my having no real religion in my life for a long time. I was born into a catholic family but never warmed to it…So I came to consider myself a spiritual person. Honestly I find I’m drawn to different aspects of different religions…so I follow what appeals to me, not attaching myself to any one faith. Bottom line. I believe in my Creator..and I strive to be a good person, a kind and caring person…preferring to leave the bs and the idea of organized religion behind (this is my personal opinion)

I know your wondering where I’m going with this…….This last week my emotions have been all over the place. Jims been gone 14 months already, which BTW, friggin’ blows my mind. I cried. A lot. Many tears were spilt this week. So, while in the midst of my emotional meltdown, I prayed, my way. To my Creator. I questioned my purpose here…I shared how I felt disconnected with life, and questioned where I belong….I asked to die…I guess you can say I was having my own personal pity party and decided I needed to invite Him to the party and share how I was feeling……tears in of themselves have a way of lightening the load of grief I carry, but there is something to be said with talking/praying and putting it out there for ‘them’ to hear.

I eventually pulled on my big girl panties and went to Walmart on Thursday,,cause that’s what one does, or at least I do when I’m having a pity party for myself…I go shopping. I saw register 11 was opened (I’m a numbers gal 11:11), and I got in line. The lady in front of me had a skateboard in her cart, which had no price, no UPC code,,,nothing. So y’all know the drill. The cashier called for help..someone came to take the skateboard and find a price. The lady turned to me to apologize. I smiled and said no problem, stuff happens and I’m not in any rush. She turned away, and then turned back to me and said ” Im sorry to stare, but I’m being pulled to you, to tell you he’s with you, and that you have more work to do here. You belong here, right now. It’s not time for you to leave, not yet.” I stood there, I’m sure a sight, with my mouth wide open and my eyes filling with tears, shaking my head. I walked around my cart and she hugged me. She then held both my hands, squeezed then and said again “you belong here…and they are around you. They all hear you and your not alone.” She then opened her eyes, shyly smiled at me and said again, “I could see ‘it’ all around you and needed to share that with you, I hope you don’t think I’m crazy.” Crazy? Nah, not crazy, not crazy at all…..

I don’t believe in coincidences …instead I chose to believe some things just can’t be explained and quite honestly, I prefer the ‘there’s no explanation’ explanation. Pretty cool stuff….

Open Heart…Open Eyes

One needs to open up not

Just their eyes.

But also their hearts to ‘see’..

The signs that are all around us

And the comfort they can bring……

I see with my eyes

A leaf, folded over,

encased in early frost.

My heart ‘sees’ an Angel Wing,

Reminding me your not lost….

My eyes see autumn colored branches

reaching for the morning sunlight,

drying from yesterday’s snow.

My heart ‘sees’ a frosty heart

Amidst the ‘mourning’ glow.

©lindafedroff_december10,2017

Cardinal Meme

I Believe…In Signs ☀

It’s no secret to those who ‘know’ me and read my blog….I’m a believer in SIGNS. First thing I check in the morning is the ON THIS DAY feature on FB. 7 years ago, I shared this photo of Jim and I.


Then….this popped up in my newsfeed…….


Saving the best for last…….I just returned from a trip to the store. The very store where Jim and  I worked and first met each other 17 years ago…….I was in the store less then a minute when I bumped into a gal we both knew, who still works there. As I stopped to talk to her, the entire store was plunged into darkness (about 10 seconds). The lights came back on and then went out and on once again. We laughed, looked up and said Hey Jim 😊❤ I know there are some who poopoo the whole idea of signs, I feel sorry for them. By not opening themselves up, they’re missing out……….I SAW THE SIGN…..AND I BELIEVE 💛☀

Day 3: I Am Grateful 🙏

For today……

Day 3: I Am Grateful…My Faith….My Beliefs…..


I’m so very Grateful that over the years, as Jim and I grew together, our Spirituality and Faith grew as well. We didn’t need a building, we didn’t need any one person telling us who, what, where, when, and how to Believe. Our Beliefs, My Beliefs, are what is helping me today. I know, actually, not only do I know, I Feel Jim, as well as our Grandparents. They are with me, surrounding me with their love, giving me strength….

My Soul Strolls have taken on a whole new meaning to me….my journey is taking me from my beloved beach back to the woods for a while. I’ve no doubt, I’ll continue to heal amongst the trees and trails…I will listen to the whispers of the wind, the musical sounds of the waterfalls and I will know He is with me……for Nature is my church.



You Gotta Believe….Sandbox Writing Challenge

Before we start our new book via The Sandbox Writing Challenge next week, we’ve got one more interim challenge to keep us in the writing groove….the question posed to us was…..

` When was the last time not getting what you wanted turned out to be a stroke of luck?

I know there have been many times this has happened,,,,but the one that stands out right now for me was how we ended up here. 

Before this little island ever became our ‘home’ it wasn’t even on our radar. We were actually at one point looking into buying a home in one of the many lake communities up in Northern Pa. We spent a few weekends with a relator looking at lake homes, and then we found ‘the one’. 

this isnt ‘the one’ but its close

I was extremely excited..I had visions of cozy winters by the wood stove ..holidays with the kids………all that was standing in the way was $$$$$$. Without going into personal details, when things were finalized…the $$$$$ disappeared……….to say we were disappointed is an understatement…but very quickly we realized there wasn’t a thing we could do about it. Instead, we found a small place to rent, and proceeded to move along in our lives……..and then, one weekend in October ’06, we decided to take a road trip…a coin was tossed, heads Mystic Connecticut…tails Chincoteage Virginia. Tails won…………….we came down here, me knowing full well the story of Misty, but nothing more than that…….little did we know, as we drove across the causeway to this little island, that 4 months later it would be our home. We felt the pull almost immediately. We spent 4 days visiting and getting to know the island, met some amazing people, and fell in love with everything about this place. We went back to Pa, but found we could not get Chincoteague out of our minds hearts. 

So, in December, I emailed a relator, inquired about year round rentals and made an appointment to meet in early February. To make a long story shorts, we came for three days, found a place, and 3 weeks later we were here……we arrived with no jobs, just a few dollars in our pockets, but we were together and we were living by the sea….we would figure things out as we went along……

Within a few weeks of moving here, a job became available that brought hubby out of retirement and back into a control tower…2 months later he was working and I was volunteering at the library….it was then we adopted the mantra “you gotta Believe”……… 

There is no doubt in my mind we were meant to be here. If we had purchased that home in PA, we would never have flipped that coin…………
Next month will be 10 years since that first visit……we still greet each and every day Believing and Living our island life……..and we Treasure every moment of our NOW……

POSTSCRIPT: THAT SUMMER…THE DRAGONFLIES CAME 💙